Project Runway: The New Season

Well girls and boys, Project Runway has started again. And this time we have 90 WHOLE MINUTES per episode. Which means 30 more minutes of designer drama and Tim Gunn-isms. As long as there is more Gunn, I'm good.

This season started off differently. 17 designers from literally ALL over. With some pretty odd names, pretty quirky personalities, and the same old stereotypes. We have Peach, Casanova and Mondo. And then there's Jason "Bowler Hat" Stapler. More to come on him.

The cast "met" in odd locations through NYC, reminiscent of The Real World. It was awkward and hard to follow. When the designers do finally all converge in one location, it's the Lincoln Center and to meet Heidi and my man Tim.

Once they are welcomed and given the cursory "You're the best group Project Runway has ever had!" from Tim, it is revealed they are STILL auditioning. That's right, they have an immediate challenge! The first part of the challenge they are asked to remove one item of clothing from their luggage to use in their design. But wait...in typical Heidi fashion, their's a twist. Each designer is asked to hand their garment to the person on their right! Some people, namely Casanova, are visibly shaken up. Poor, poor Casanova. But not so much really. Anyone who has watched PR knows there is always a twist. So big C the next time Heidi asks you to pick something out, maybe you shouldn't choose a pair of $1007 pants! (I could go on and on about this particular topic, but I won't. There is just no point.)

Once in the work room, they are introduced to their workspace, their "Brother" sewing room and their HP Touchsmart tmt2 drawing pad. AND because they are SO considerate, PR has arranged for Mood to come to the designers so they can get to work right away! Isn't that sweet???

The designers have five hours to design and finish their look, and are reminded by the Gunn to use the Piperlime accessories wall "thoughtfully".

As the Gunn walks the room, there are some noticeable "worries" he has, and the look he gives the camera as he walks away from Jason of the Bowler Hat fame is absolutely priceless. I have a feeling these extra thirty minutes of Tim are going to be well worth my time!

The closer the runway time gets, the more stressed out and frantic our designers get. Jason resorts to stapling his backward kimono closed. Which makes one pause to wonder...exactly what did he do in the last five hours? Because this garment is not styled, not deconstructed, not sewn anywhere. So what exactly did he do with his time? I'm thinking he went around scaring the bejeezus out of everyone else with his hat and his sewing corset. OR maybe he had some lunch and took a nap. He certainly didn't design.

Runway time comes and it is clear there are some hot messes about to walk down that runway. Heidi introduces the judges. The ever orange, oompa loompa looking Michael Kors. The glowing, Loubotin devotee, Nina Garcia. And this week's guest judge Selma Blair who was cute as ever in her sleek bob.

The show seemed to last ages, and I was pleasantly surprised at some of the finished looks. I was also pretty shocked and weirded out by some of the looks. Casanova...I'm looking at you! All I could think of was Jennifer Lopez circa 2000 in the Versace green, plunging down to her knees dress. Only, she actually looked ok in it. Casanova's dress was, as Michael Kors so aptly put it, something you'd see on a "stripper in Dubai". Harsh, but true.

The designers come out and the request safe designers are called out and collapse with relief backstage while seven contestant's remained on the runway. Gretche was named the winner with perhaps the most boring dress in the history of PR (really, Andy's black ensemble should have taken the whole thing. It was amazing!) and the final six are all told they are on the bottom. One by one they are picked apart, particularly Ivy who made the now infamous "Pants from pants" and Casanova, who had to have Nina interpret at one point...and then still didn't understand what they wanted him to say. But then, how does one defend something like that?

In the end, poor McKell was sent packing (apparently because of the styling and not so much because of the actual construction. Excuse me, when did this become Project Style the Model?) over a Dubai Hooker, a backward stapeled kimono, and pants from pants. It wasn't PR's finest moment.

And on another note, did anyone else notice how bitchy Heidi has gotten?

I'm giving PR three more episodes, and if it doesn't get better, not even Tim can keep me watching. It's just not the same on Lifetime.

Real House Wives of New York City: The Awkward Edition

Where to begin on last night's epi of RHWONYC? There is just so much, I'm having brain over load.

I guess we should begin at the beginning. Kelly left. Hallelujah! It was incredible to see the sense of relief on the faces, and obvious exhaustion, of the four women left in the aftermath of Hurricane Kelly. Alas, it was to be short lived since Tropical Storm Jill decided to crash the party.

First, it was THE. BEST. MOMENT. EVER. on RHWONYC when Jill got the cold shoulder from everyone. And it was well deserved. Who shows up at someone's house, unannounced, under false pretense after making such a big deal about being unable to go? Jill Zarin that's who. When she screams "Ramona, we came!" Ramona's "Why?" was priceless. Seriously, what did she expect? Especially knowing now that Ramona had called Jill to fill her in on Kelly's return and ask that she meet her at the airport. Jill doesn't care about anyone but Jill and that became crystal clear in this episode. I won't even touch her comment on how it was all Alex's fault. Just stupid. Poor Bobby. That's all I can say about him.

I have to give Ramona a ton of credit for laying it out to Jill and putting her invited (and attending) guests before that of a selfish friend. Kudos.

Back in the city, we see Jill, Luann and Jennifer are waiting on Kelly to arrive so Luann can hear Kelly's version of what went down on Scary Island. It isn't long however before Luann realizes Kelly isn't exactly giving her the entire, or even truthful scoop. Luann wrote in her Bravo blog today: "...she contradicts herself all the time, making her hard to believe." She's also hard to believe because the woman can't put two coherent thoughts together, or remember things the way they actually happened. I don't know, does anyone else recall Bethenny actually saying "I started a smear campaign about you in the press?" No? Me neither. I think Bethenny had it right, "No way did that broad go to college." Especially not Columbia. And if she did, I fear for the state of our country if those are the graduates it's producing.
Oy.

Sonja's party was awesome. I totally want to be friends with this chick. But it was strange how Luann called everyone together to get the "real" scoop on what happened during Ramona's vaca. Bethenny was surprisingly compassionate about Kelly and I think that's what made Luann see that maybe, just maybe B had it right from the start.

Jill's skating party was weird. Jennifer looked like her part was fabulous, and when Jill bit it on the ice, I almost fell off the couch laughing. But what the hell was the skating dress about Jill? Really? Just stop trying to reclaim your youth. You're a grown woman, start acting like one.

Ramona was hysterical reacting to Kelly's version of what transpired on the island. It took a lot for Ramona to walk away and actually be nice to Kelly. I truly think all the ladies, minus Jill, realize now that Kelly has a serious mental health issue.

I'm pretty sure the lunch with Bethenny isn't going to go as planned for Jill, which will just be icing on the cake for me. I can't stand this woman and wish someone, who can yell louder, would tell Jill to fuck off and leave everyone alone.

I would like to take this opportunity to say that if Kelly comes out in the press ONE MORE TIME claiming that this was all for television and NOT real, I will scream. Her mantra since she started on this show was that she was the only "real" person there. And she just wished everyone could be "real". So for her to try and spin this saying it's all drama for T.V. is just stupid. But then, Kelly isn't exactly know for her smarts now is she? Because you know...she's got it like that. (Major eye roll)

All in all, compared to last week, this episode was fairly boring. I hope next week's vow renewal ceremony and lunch with Jill and Bethenny is more entertaining.

Are You Ready for Real Housewives Of NYC Tonight?

I am. I CANNOT wait to see Jill show up and get the "unwelcome" mat. It is going to be fabulous to see her not be the center of the gossip and be clueless to the going's on of last week. I just can't understand how she thought Ramona, or anyone there, would have been happy to see her. Except maybe La La Land Kelly. Check out her arrival below:



Lots and lots of hype over the reunion show which was taped yesterday. Can't wait to see it.

Tonight's recap will be up immediately following the show. Enjoy the insanity everyone! :)

Robin Hood...the New Adventure

So last weekend, I went to see the newest Robin Hood directed by Ridley Scott and starring Russell Crowe and Cate Blanchett. There really is only one word to describe this move: FANTASTIC!

This isn't your typical Robin Hood, taking from the rich to give to the poor, flick. This begins well before Robin and his band of Merry Men took a stand against the tyranical Prince John.

Opening up with Robin at war in France with King Richard, we see him travel from France back to England, playing the part of a dead knight so as to save an old man's (Max von Sydow) properties and daughter in law, Marian, from being overtaken by the crown. Robin of course falls in love with Marian, because...well, she's Cate freaking Blanchett and who wouldn't love her?

Though we do see a Sherriff of Nottingham, a wonderfully skeevy portayal by Matthew Macfadyen, the real bad guy in this is Godfrey. And who better to play a completely evil, ruthless and morally bankrupt character than Mark Strong? He is simply amazing. So good at making the audience truly hate a character.

Rounding out the Merry Men are Mark Addy as Friar Tuck, Kevin Durand as Little John (HYSTERICAL!), Scott Grimes as Will Scarlett and Alan Doyle as Allen A'Dayle.

Ridely Scott is brilliant. The tone of the movie was enhanced by a very realistic set and background, depicting a time of great poverty and not much lavishness to go around. I love that Scott's movies all have this wonderful aspect to them.

It's a wonderful take on a story that's been, in my opinion, WAY over done in Hollywood. I highly recommend it.

Welcome the New Mayor of Crazy Town

UPDATED: A response from Kelly that really clears things up....if you live in the same reality she does!

Kelly Killoren Bensimon everybody!

OK, I realize we're coming in WAY late in the game here, BUT we have been watching the whole season and realized there's just no way to pass up this opportunity to weigh in on the crazy that is Kelly.

First, let's start out by saying for all that went down, those other four women did a VERY respectable job in trying to remain calm and focused. With the exception of Bethenny's brief "GO TO BED" outburst, the only person spewing the crazy was Kelly. And boy did she ever spew. Ramona, even drunk, was remarkably composed in the face of all the nastiness coming from her left. Alex, who I love, was speechless and you could tell she was trying to figure out what the hell Kelly was saying. Sonja, God love her, was the lone voice of reason in the end. And poor Bethenny...seriously, could this season get any more emotional for this chick?

Now...Kelly, Kelly, Kelly. So many questions, so many remarks, my brain is literally overloaded with all the contradiction this chick brings about. She claims to be the only "real" person on that show. I suppose that's true if you consider her reality. Which is clearly not the same as everyone else's.

Let's examine the insanity from last night:

1. Kelly is so fixated on Bethenny, it isn't really funny. It's almost to a stalkerish standpoint. It doesn't surprise me that Kelly hasn't heard of Bethenny cooking for any of her friends, because I don't think Kelly has any real friends. But that's neither here nor there. The fact that she can't let the "cook" vs. "chef" go is very telling. And very sad. Poor Bethenny ends up in tears on the couch. (On a side note, Kelly tweeted earlier this week that the "girls make her cry". Last night, the only person I saw REALLY in tears was Bethenny. The whole bedroom scene with Kelly's cryfest was ridiculous beyond words.)
2. Kelly is creeped out by a very kind, and VERY unnecessary gesture by Bethenny. Who gets creeped out by getting FREE GIFTS? Seriously. I wonder if she has the same reaction to any other swag bag she receives? If so, Kelly, please feel free to send any unwanted, "creepy" gifts my way. Thanks so much.
3. I won't even discuss her conversation with Jill Zarin except to say that we just get to see more incoherrant babble by Mayor Kelly.
4. The dinner party. Oy. At this point, the whole thing just because a sad, scary mess. Kelly had one thing right the whole show. She is on scary island. Population 1: Mayor Kelly Killoren Bensimon. The phone call with her daughters was just weird. For someoen so protective of her children, she sure has no problem letting the world know just what is going on. It is just bad manners to have a cell phone conversation in the middle of a party. Excuse yourself. Be a lady. Sheesh. And what are the odds that Kelly gets the ONE steak not cooked properly and with a string???? I believe that's what you call Karma. And then all hell breaks loose and Kelly becomes a stark raving mad lunatic. Let's review just one scene from the whole crazy night shall we?
   
   
   
   Not one thing she said makes sense in any way shape or form. Her insults were sad, her demeanor pathetic and her skipping to her room for gummy bears, jelly beans and lollipops was strange. Sonja saves the day and everyone, Bethenny included, takes a step back and finally realizes what is going on here and it's not just that Kelly has it out for Bethenny. The woman is certafiable. Props to B for giving an undeserving apology to Kelly for any offenses committed (I'm still confused on that one but whatever).

I think everyone now knows what B has known all along. Kelly is nuts. I knew it from day one. But I thought it was an act...now I know it's for real. There seems to be a large number of viewers who think Kelly is a druggie. I'm inclined to agree based on her erratic behavior but that's also a sign of a severe mental illness. Either way, I'm a little frightened for her girls...

I am SO looking forward to Jill showing up and getting the cold shoulder next week.

So....Where Have We Been?

We've been sitting on our lazy butt's that's where!

But we're coming back, so look out world!